what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops