How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

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A Blonde, Brunnette, and red head are on the beach. They find a sand gene and are each granted a wish. The Brunnette wishes for a yot. The Red Head wishes to never again get sun burn. The Blonde wishes for more sun. The world is overtaken and insinerated by the sun. An alien spaceship finds the Red head in a space suit floating around randomly when they ask how she survived she says "I don't sun burn"

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How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

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Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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What was so funny about my sister getting raped? Nothing, there's never anything funny about someone getting raped, especially when it is a close friend or family member

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back at her

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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What do you call a black airline pilot? An airline pilot.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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