Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Q: Why did the baby cry when it came out of the moms stomach? A: The doctor dropped it!

One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

what did michael jackson do when i swore at him? nothing he's dead

What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

69.

What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

breasts

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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