What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than the dole. The SRC!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

George W. Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -10

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops