What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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What fires shots? A gun

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roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the raisin say to the toaster? Nothing. The raisin lacks a central nervous system, and the toaster is an inanimate object.

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-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

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Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

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how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

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Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

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There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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