Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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How many mathematicians does it take to count?

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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I like touching my boobs

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

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What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

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What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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