How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Why did the mokey board the westbound train? I said gray umbrella noodle head!

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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