Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

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Womans baksetball...

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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what is big round and fat? Your MOM

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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I was going to tell a gay joke. But that would offensive

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yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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