A russian gives away vodka.

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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I'm rick james bitch

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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