Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

Oh s***

Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

What is both bold and brash? Fox

a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

salad days!

Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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