Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

what does a human and a bucket of red paint have in common? . . Both are not tigers

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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