A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

Knock knock.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

How did the black guy survive the bus crash? At the time of the bus crash, it was a segregated community, therefore no black people were allowed on buses.

Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

Whats brown a sticky, shit

the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

wanna hear a joke womens rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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