Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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A blonde dies Lololol

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kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

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What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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