Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because it never told anyone. Chickens can't talk.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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Y couldn't you stop the bowling ball? Because it was going down a hill.

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What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

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What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops