You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

What did the asshole say to his friend behind him? Fart

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

I asked the librarian where to find a specific book. She told me where it was.

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

Whose your daddy? Not me

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

What do Ping-Pong and Godzilla have in common? Both of them have nothing to do with budhism.

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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