Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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why was little timmys mother so upset on mothers day? Because he had been abducted earlier that week

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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God wrote this joke.................................

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

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What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

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How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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