What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

Dave: Knock, knock Steven: Come in.

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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