How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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brock has small hands for a small job

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The WNBA

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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Why did Jennifer shit herself? Because there was a black man staring through her window!

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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