What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Camerons hair is Curly..

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

ure mama's so fat

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops