Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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What's worse than being eaten by a giant bear? Hitler.

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Brain fart

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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ewrg

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

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Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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