What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

Roses are dead Violets are dead I'm a terrible gardener.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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