HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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What did the jew say to the black man? Nothing they were in a mall that got invaded by evil trees.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Get up Look in the mirror

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your child has been in a terrible car accident.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to take three harpoons to the chest and still manage to feast on a family of baby seals...... Hi my name is Joey

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What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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