okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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eoin burgin is fat

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What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

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How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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