Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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A blond, brunet, and redhead were stranded on an island. With in a week they all died of starvation.

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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I ran out of anti-jokes. However, here's a cool math puzzle. 492 357 816 Using every number from 1-9, each row added up equals to 15, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally. Here's another cool word play TEA URN BAY Words horizontally are Tea, Urn, Bay Words vertically are Tub, Era, Any Words diagonally are Try, Bra

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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If Tiger Woods is Asian and Black what is he? A golfer!

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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why dont they make black forks

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

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Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What do you do when a red gorilla comes running at you with 7 dominoes in his hand Ask him to stop

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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