Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops