Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

Wh do you call a Zeebra without black and white stripes? A horse

Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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