you dint have to be a jew matt

How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

Q: Why did the son of the dad who went fishing with him die? A: Well, he was either eaten by a shark or drowned while being the bait before that.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

hey guys im gay

your mama's so fat... that's it

Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

What did john say to bob Hey bob

wanna hear a joke womens rights

What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

Why is Texas so hot? The sun

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

How do you make your house smell bad? fart

How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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