id give my right arm to be ambidextrous

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

roses are red vilits are blue get in the van or i kill you

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

A black man and a white man are in a car. Which one is driving? A person who is legally allowed and physically capable of operating and automobile.

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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