- Anti Joke

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

A Black and a Mexican are in the back of a car, they are carpooling to save money on gas.

Knock Knock Who's There Me

what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

whats black and blue and white all over A little caucasian boy who is being abused by his parents

why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

why did the man die? Because he was robbing a bank and police used lethal weapons By- the duck

Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

DIY LOL Can't Be Unseen Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Meanwhile In ethugtxt Check out our iPhone app! Popular Newest Random Write Your Own! . . Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Anti Joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. MOAR?? Want more? You might be interested in… Anti-Joke Chicken Anti-Joke Triceratops Download Our Free App! Hay guise, our iPhone app was just approved! Pictures From Our Other Sites ffuuu More Fail at 11 Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Car Failures Porn SFW Quotes From Other Sites “-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you..” via: Anti-Pickup Line “In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled....” via: Clarksonisms “Zero-snack calories..” via: Pointless Inventions “The power to instantly reduce the sales price of an item to ten percent of the original but you must buy at least ten..” via: Pointless Super Powers “I count how many steps it takes to cross a section of sidewalk, and will continue taking the same amount of steps until I realize....” via: Things You Think Only You Do “I love you.... :D.” via: ethugtxt .. Anti Joke Anti-Pickup Line Clarksonisms Pointless Inventions Things You Think Only You Do Feedback :: Advertising Inquiries :: Copyright :: Privacy :: Terms of Service ©2008-2011 Anti Joke. All rights reserved. A Horse Head Huffer Production. Rails Hosting provided by BlueBox

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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