Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

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josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

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Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

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Why didn't the tv turn on? It wasn't plugged in

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What did the old man get for Christmas? He forgot because he has alzheimer's

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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swag

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

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Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops