'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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