Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

What two Mexicans call a stray cat? Gato

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

There's an african american, a latino, and an asian man riding in the car, whos driving? Obciously one of the three

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

Donald Trump decided to run for President.

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

A man walks into a bar, and he died.

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Yo mama is so fat she died

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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