Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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What do you get if you cross an Irishman with a Brazilian Aristocrat? I don't know.

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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