Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

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What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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Hi.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops