Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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I am black. And i will beat your children. At checkers. They can be the red .

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I didn't know that guy did crossfit

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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