Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

Whats green? The color green.

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Holy guacamole Pineapples

Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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