What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

thumb_up thumb_down -6

knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is a dog's favorite color? Dogs are colorblind and can not see colors.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the boy say after he fell out of the tree? Nothing, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

thumb_up thumb_down -6

It was the week of the school formal and a girl rang up her date and said I don't have a dress for the formal. He said ok the lets go out and buy one. So they went to the dress shop to buy one but the line was really, really long so they waited in the dress line for ages and ages until they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. As they did, the girl said well I suppose you need a suit, so they went to the suit shop, and again, the suit line was really long but they waited in the suit line and they finally got to the front, paid and walked out. Then the guy said, well if we want to go to the formal in style, then we will need a limo. So they went to the limo shop but the limo line was really long as well. But again, they waited in the limo line and they got to the front, paid and left. It was finally the night of the formal, she had her dress, he had his suit and they arrived in their limo. Everyone was having a great time and the the girl said to her partner, I'm a bit thirsty could you please get me a drink? So the guy went over to the drinks table and went to get a glass of punch but there was no punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roeses Are Red Violets Are Blue He's The One For Me And Not For You, And If You Try To Take My Place I Will Take My Fist And Smash Your Face(:

thumb_up thumb_down -6

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

thumb_up thumb_down -6

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops