Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Communism hehe xd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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Why did the Chef go to jail? He killed his wife.

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No

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2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops