A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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Why did the plane crash? Because he pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

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One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

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Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

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want more?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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The Ohio State Buckeyes

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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