Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

Knock knock. Who's there? Mike. Oh, come in.

What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

Q: A squirrel a chipmunk and a spider monkey are fighting over these nuts. Who gets them? A: Your Mom ;p

What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

say sopha king together then sat funny at the end

My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.