How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

What did the guy day to the other guy with an afro on his head? You look like a guy with an afro on his head.

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

I'm gay Mr Goodwin

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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