- Anti Joke

How do you get a drugged man, a giant sombrero, and a guitar into a Chuck-E-Cheese? You take multiple trips.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

Nickelback

Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

What is life? Paul.

What's stupid a light bulb.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue