What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Arms and legs, NOT GET IN MY MINIVAN!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

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What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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How did the little boy fall over? He was tripped up by his alcoholic father.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

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Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Weaner

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops