A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

who is gay wit mon james cornish

It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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