You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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What do you call a cow with no legs A cow with no legs.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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Q. What's pink and fluffy A. Pink fluff Q. What's blue and fluffy A. Blue fluff

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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wenis

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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