Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops