How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? -Gave her a timeout

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -34

So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I read the terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q. Why can't Stevie wonder read? A. Because he is black

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar. All three are alcoholics and have done irreparable damage to their livers.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops