Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I am High How about you?

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

A woman is shopping at a grocery store. She picks up a half gallon of skim milk, 2 loaves of wheat bread, one dozen organic eggs, and some carrots. She goes to the checkout line. "You must be single." the clerk says. Amazed at the flattering insight of the clerk, the woman says, "Yes I am. How could you tell?". "Because you're ugly".

Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

What comes after 23? 24.

Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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