roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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Two fish in a tank one said "How do you drive this thing?"

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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