Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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What do you call a cow with no legs A cow with no legs.

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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wenis

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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So a baby seal walks into a club...

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To return to the roost he had recently escaped.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops