You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops